Myshuno! 2013 Prompt: “‘Fifty isn’t too many cats...’” (296 words)

[esmeiolanthe]

The prompt for this story was “‘Fifty isn’t too many cats. Fifty-ONE? Now that’s too many.’” submitted by fuzzy_spork. This story fits into Chapter 5 of Cecil’s CCL, which hasn’t been released yet, but I don’t think this is too spoilery.

Rating: G

Dramatis Personae
Cecil Shankel, the Crazy Cat Lover of the title and possessor of one Nice point.
Allyn Shankel, his wife, slightly less Crazy and slightly Nicer.

Setting
The living room of the cat-Shankel house. Allyn is reading a book when Cecil comes in, waving the newspaper.

CECIL: I can’t believe it! This is ridiculous! (shoves the newspaper at Allyn) Have you seen this?
ALLYN: (reads) “Alien abductions have increased 400% since 2009.” (looks up) Well, that looks alarming, but you have to remember that when you start with a very small number –
CECIL: Not that! Underneath that!
ALLYN: (reads) “City council passed a new zoning ordinance limiting the number of cats per household to fifty.” (looks up) So?
CECIL: “So”?! “So”?! They are trampling on my rights as a freedom-loving Sandersvillian! I have the right to keep and cuddle cats! What kind of twisted thinking went into that? “Fifty isn’t too many cats. Fifty-ONE? Now that’s too many.”? It’s a completely arbitrary and meaningless cut-off point!
ALLYN: Yes, but you also need to take care of your cats properly.
CECIL: Well, duh. If you can’t take care of one cat, then one is too many. But that’s a reasonable and thought-out policy based in logic.
ALLYN: Okay, so here’s some more logic for you. How many cats do we have now?
CECIL: Five.
ALLYN: And how many do you want to have?
CECIL: At one time?
ALLYN: Mm-hm.
CECIL: (frowns in concentration) I don’t know. No more than ten.
ALLYN: So you’re angry about a limit that will allow you to have five times more cats that you actually even want, and probably ten times more cats than most people could care for humanely.
CECIL (sulkily): It’s the principle of the thing. You can take my cats, but you’ll never take my freedom!
ALLYN: And they’ll take your cats when they pry them out of your cold, dead hands?
CECIL: Exactly! (narrows his eyes) Are you making fun of me?
ALLYN: Who, me? (goes back to her book) Heaven forefend.

Comments

[katrisims.livejournal.com]

It's the principle of the thing! :D More cats for everyone!

[esmeiolanthe.livejournal.com]

I admit to borrowing some of the American anti-gun-control rhetoric here. Only it makes much more sense with cats. :)

Thanks for reading! :D

[mzyra.livejournal.com]

Hahaha, awwwww ^.^ Poor Cecil, I understand where he's coming from. Though I fear 50 cats might turn on me and decide that I would be tastier than the food I would give them <.< >.>
Also, death by allergies >.

[esmeiolanthe.livejournal.com]

Well, the good thing is that while you might be more tasty than the food, actually killing you would be too much like work, and cats don't care for work. :P The allergies would be a definite problem, though.

Thanks for reading! :D